Cross-country princesses, reading Aretha's lips, high price for Prince and Madonna changes her name in today's Foxlight.

So now "The Simple Life" (search) is basically two rich girls panhandling? I admit I liked the idea of the pair taking a road trip, but I was wrong. There's no tension when the gals can split whenever they want. And that alleged goal of getting the pink truck and trailer to L.A.? TV Guide says they only get as far as Texas and then fly home. In the words of comedian Pat Cooper -- "It's over!"

Aretha Franklin (search) says she didn't pull a Britney and lip synch the national anthem at the NBA Finals. But why did ABC keep showing long shots instead of close-ups? And where was the mystery chorus that could be heard? I'm willing to give her some R-E-S-P-E-C-T, but Queen, we need the straight dope. Start singing.

Prince (search) or whatever hieroglyphic he calls himself isn't considered a safe investment -- at least by memorabilia fans. His first studio recording made when he was 17 failed to reach a minimum of over $600,000 at a London auction. More than doves crying around Paisley Park your Princeness?

Finally, Madonna (search) wants us to start calling her Esther? More Kabbalah kraziness? Yep. And it doesn't sound as cool saying "I just scored $350 tickets to Esther."