The woman whose lawsuit triggered Colorado's recruiting scandal wrote in her diary she wanted to "ruin the lives" of football players she believes were present when she was allegedly gang-raped in 2001.

The entries are part of Lisa Simpson's (search) deposition, copies of which were obtained by the Longmont Daily Times-Call and the Rocky Mountain News. Earlier copies released by the university had those portions blacked out.

"I know that I probably should not take so much pleasure in this, but I am happy to know that some of my pain is now being felt by these boys," Simpson wrote in her diary. "God help me, I will ruin the lives of (five specific players), and whoever the recruits are."

In a separate deposition in Simpson's federal lawsuit, Boulder County District Attorney Mary Keenan said she believes the CU football (search) program used sex and alcohol to entice recruits. Those comments touched off a public furor when they were made public in January, prompting investigations into the school's recruiting practices.

School spokeswoman Michele Ames declined to comment about the diary entries Wednesday, as did a spokeswoman for Simpson's attorneys.

"All these things we're talking about are subject to a protective order," Ames said. "We can't or won't discuss this."

Simpson's parents, Rick and Karen Burd, said the leak of the excerpts amounted to an attack on their daughter by the university.

"The release of portions of Lisa's diary, which were ordered sealed by the judge, is another in a series of unconscionable acts by the university," they said in a statement.

Under questioning by a university lawyer last year, Simpson said she was very angry.

"And my journal was a very private place for me where I thought I could release all of my most personal inner feelings, and when I'm feeling emotional, they just come out," Simpson said during her Dec. 12 deposition.

Simpson says she was raped during a party at her apartment by two athletes while players surrounded the bed. She said several other players then demanded sex. She said she was drunk at the time.

The men said the sex was consensual, and prosecutors didn't file sexual assault charges because of the difficulty of prosecuting the case. They did file felony charges against four football players for allegedly providing alcohol to minors at the party.

Simpson's lawsuit accuses the university of creating a hostile environment and other violations of federal gender-equity legislation. Two other women who said they were raped during or just after the party have also sued.

The school has already made sweeping changes to its football recruiting program, and coach Gary Barnett is on leave pending the outcome of a Board of Regents investigation. The state attorney general is also investigating.