Michael Jackson, Jerry Seinfeld, Matt Damon and must not-see TV all in the cathode ray tube glow of The Foxlight.

A new book on Michael Jackson claims he abused Bubbles The Chimp, injected himself with a fluid that made him whiter and paid Lisa Marie Presley $15 million to marry him. So nothing new or outrageous in this book either, huh?

Jerry Seinfeld misses the cast of Seinfeld, but there probably won't be a cast reunion show. Jerry says he's a completely happy man, but he doesn't dream funny. He has a new movie called Comedian about putting together a stand-up comedy act from scratch. The documentary reveals a lot about Jerry, including little glimpses of his home life. But the sex of his next child? That he doesn't know. He says his wife does know but isn't telling, leading to lots of interesting conversations about the name. He joked it might be "Pat."

Best moment at the Saturday Night Live after party? Someone shook host Matt Damon's hand and said "Mr. Affleck, I really love your work." For the record, Affleck thought it was funny.

And finally, the new TV series Hack must be referring to the guy who writes it.