So ABC News had yet another article on Internet addiction, about some dude who spent 16 hours a day on the Web. The story cites the usual experts and focused on the rise of rehab for this terrible affliction. One doc claims that the person who is addicted to his computer is going to have the same high as someone who goes to his drug dealer.

Poopy-doop.

If you actually look at why men and women abuse the Web, you find that the compulsion simply defines the flaws in both sexes. For women, it's shopping and gossiping in chat rooms. For men, it's feverishly rifling through porn and gambling away their paychecks.

See, it's not the Internet's fault. These vices have existed well before the Web. And broadband made it that much more accessible. So, blaming your need for porn or gossip on the Internet is like blaming your problems with pot on your bong.

Bottom line: Addiction is the most overused word in our language and when you think about it, it's the easiest problem in the world to solve.

Addiction is the only so-called "affliction" where the actual "disease" can be removed from your presence without actual surgery. You just throw the laptop out the window. This also works with cocaine, booze and tropical fish. Just give me a heads up when you do this — I'll be outside with a catcher's mitt.

And if you disagree with me, then you sir are worse than Hitler.

Greg Gutfeld hosts "Red Eye with Greg Gutfeld" weekdays at 3 a.m. ET. Send your comments to: redeye@foxnews.com