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The Foxlight: Britney Engaged and Unwashed

Tuesday, July 06, 2004

NEW YORK —  Britney Spears (search) may be going down the tubes with her philandering hubby-to-be in today's Foxlight.

Here's another stunner: One more woman is stepping forward to say Britney's new fiance is not that innocent. She says Kevin what's-his-name is a chronic liar and cheat. And that Britney had better watch his back, because behind hers he's gonna find another pop tart. She also says Federline was penniless before he met her Britness, and is bragging to pals that it's "hilarious" he's marrying her.

Meanwhile, the New York Post says Britney has let herself go. I don't have the heart to show you pictures of her on crutches, wearing the same pair of cut-offs, with a cigarette dangling from her mouth and hair that looks like it hasn't been washed in a week. But I've seen it and I can promise you, she isn't shooting any album covers or publicity stills this week.

Britney, hit the showers, dump the loser, get some nicotine gum, don't blow bubbles with it because that's nasty and head back out on tour. Even on crutches. Your public wants to see the happy Britney. Remember your Mouseketeer (search) past. That rumbling coming from Walt Disney's grave? That's him spinning.

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