Beating Bullies

" none of that art it's not the school -- and you probably know that can be stressful. For any kid but especially if your kid has been the target of a bully our next guest is here to reveal. What to do with your child has -- bullet and also work to do. If you're the pair --"

" Now another issue Diane -- the author of baby steps the path from motherhood to career she's also a therapist. And life coach so all right how can you tell first up how can spot it it. If your kid is being -- there are few signs and symptoms to look for some more visible they might come home with ripped torn clothes. Their hair -- disheveled and I come in with bruises on them unfortunately obvious Sarkozy are very obvious then a little bit less obvious that they. Some depression signs like eating change is sleep patterns are changing they have more anxiety they don't want to go to school they don't want to get on the bus that I want to go back to school activities. And they start becoming more isolated and I want to be with their friends anymore and we now for kids and teens that's the most important things -- so if you figure out your child is being all right what do you do. Well this a few things you want to do one you want to contact the school they need to be aware that the principal the teacher at the school psychologist counselor they need to be aware that your child is being the only. There's probably other kids getting bullied his wealth we want to contact the school. You want to also talk to your child and ask for as much information as possible. And that same open line of communication you want to let them now it's not their fault. Because a child will feel like what do I do wrong why they picking on me solely you know what's going on. You want the child no it's not their fault it's not personal and you want to work on boosting their self esteem that is very important do you would you want to tell the boy's parents you want to contact them out you don't want my instinct right and naturally if parents you want to protect their children but did not want to contact the parent one that is the school's responsibility they will contact the police parent. The other thing it's. What is the parent is the parent of a -- themselves because sometimes the Bali is just following. -- their parents sometimes coaches could be the Bali and their son or daughter follows the same patterns of -- on the flip side what do you do if you find out your child is the bullet. -- yes and it it is that if your child two isn't Ali. You want to do a few things one that have to be consequences for at their behavior and you have that consistency as a parent if we're not consistent child will know that -- know what they can get away at. So when you find out what the consequences are you must stick with that you also must use positive reinforcement so when they are behaving well -- doing good job. Let them know it praise them. Realistic expectations and -- to change overnight it took awhile to get to that point. So we want to make sure that they're realistic knowing that. It might still take a few months before they change because that is just the way it works also features a parent you change your behavior look at yourself. Are you will believe are you showing aggressive behavior -- how are you treating your children the same why. That they can follow our behavior we've -- by imitation all right keep an eye out for cyber bullying as well van -- the facts on behalf of motherhood to career thank you very much thank you so much good to."