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The Joy of Doodling

Greg Gutfeld Draws the News

• Greg Gutfeld/FNC
• Greg Gutfeld/FNC
• Greg Gutfeld/FNC
• Greg Gutfeld/FNC
• Greg Gutfeld/FNC
• Greg Gutfeld/FNC
• Greg Gutfeld/FNC
• Greg Gutfeld/FNC
• Greg Gutfeld/FNC
• Greg Gutfeld/FNC
• Greg Gutfeld/FNC
• Greg Gutfeld/FNC
• Greg Gutfeld/FNC
• Greg Gutfeld/FNC
• Greg Gutfeld/FNC
• Greg Gutfeld/FNC
• Greg Gutfeld/FNC
• Greg Gutfeld/FNC
• Greg Gutfeld/FNC
• Greg Gutfeld/FNC
• Greg Gutfeld/FNC

• 5/16: Greg recalls an awkward period when Unicorn Jones developed 'man-boobs' back in his late teens. It wasn't until he found a qualified plastic surgeon that he was able to roam shirtless along with the other woodland creatures
  
  • Art imitates life: Boobs vs. 'moobs': British court ruling sparks censorship debate
• 5/15: Everything Greg learned about women, he learned from Unicorn Jones (pictured aged 2). For example: Women smell like wondrous rainbows and can turn coal or dirt into magical tasting pixie dust. Also, they can break your spirit and turn you into an empty shell of a man
  
  • Art imitates life: Everything I know about women...
• 5/10: Greg's favorite political figure: Senator Unicorn Jones, just days before she won a state seat in Vermont. She had just posed topless for Uniboy, a skin magazine for unicorns, sprites, elves and other woodland creatures
  
  • Art imitates life: Berlusconi's babes ruffle a few feathers
• 5/8: The day before Unicorn Jones gave birth. The child belonged to former New York Met, Keith Hernandez
  
  • Art imitates life: Wife: A-Rod fainted at daughter's birth
• 5/6: Did you know Unicorn Jones was a hula girl in Maui? Greg met him on a business trip and they shared some mahi-mahi in Greg's hotel hot tub
  
  • Art imitates life: Hawaiian sovereignty seekers take over palace grounds
• 5/2: Unicorn Jones' prom picture back when he attended Happy Forest High in Woodland Creature Village, located under Greg's bed, in between his shoebox full of crusty socks and a worn out copy of Blue Boy. Unicorn wore a Raffinatti tuxedo and his date, Fluffy McNutter, donned a glamorous evening gown by Jovani
  
  • Art imitates life: Lacrosse players disciplined for bare-bottomed prom invite
• 4/30: Greg draws the time when Unicorn Jones used to play for the Boston Rainbow Unis and he fell for country music singer Fluffy McNutry, when she was only seven
  
  • Art imitates life: Report: Mindy McCready Confirms Affair With Roger Clemens
• 4/24: Greg recreates when Unicorn Jones ran his own polygamy compound, where he had 16 wives. He was later excommunicated when it was found out that unicorns are mythical woodland creatures and cannot bear human children
  
  • Art imitates life: DNA Testing of Polygamist Sect Children Completed
• 4/24: Here's what Unicorn Jones looked like before he entered Yale as an incoming freshman and how he looked after just two semesters. He went from a vibrant, muscular unicorn/Pegasus creature to an angry fat feminist with ankles the size of tree trunks
  
  • Art imitates life: Yale Pulls Student's 'Abortion Art' Project From Exhibit Opening
• 3/20: Greg's favorite gas station: Unee-Cal in San Mateo, run by an authentic unicorn. For every full tank of gas you pay for, you get a My Little Pony theme glass, along with an ounce of fairy dust
  
  • Art imitates life: Alleged sex-for-gas agreement ends with man stabbed
• 3/7: The two most recent UFOs Greg saw: They were circling above his bunk bed, inviting him to visit their happy planet, Unicornia
  
  • Art imitates life: Spooky Site Steven Spielberg to Launch Paranormal Social Network
• 3/6: Unicorn Jones, aged 11, was an avid skateboarder, but also suffered from acne, which made him unpopular among other unicorns in Heavenly Unicorn Village
  
  • Art imitates life: Study: British Think Age 11 Is Cutoff for Childhood
• 2/26: The last flight that Unicorn Jones and Fluffy McNutter went on. They were on Southwest, on their way to a bachelorette party in Boca Raton, dressed provocatively in miniskirts, along with two other of their girlfriends. On the flight, Charlie Sheen hit on them repeatedly
  
  • Art imitates life: 'Decent looking' teens tossed from Southwest Airlines flight
• 2/23: Two animals that are medically proven to make your life better: unicorns and cat/dog hybrids. Here Unicorn Jones and Fluffy McNutter are dressed as doctors because, of course, they can cure you of all your ills
  
  • Art imitates life: Study links cat ownership to lower heart attack, stroke risks
• 2/12: Greg's ideal draft pick: He's No. 34, Unicorn Jones — 6 foot 10, not including horn. He plays tight end for Magical Cloud Kingdom College, located in a box under Greg's bed
  
  • Art imitates life: College recruit's lie a tale gone horribly wrong
• 8/9: Greg's ideal fireman: half firefighter and half unicorn. Greg would call him a Fire-corn or a Uni-fighter. Or just call him, Toby -- which is actually his real name
  
  • Art imitates life: San Diego Firefighters Claim Harassment
• 8/5: Greg's ideal 'American Idol' contestant: a unicorn in a cheerleading outfit who, instead of using pom-poms, employs the severed heads of Rosie O'Donnell and Barbara Walters
  
  • Art imitates life: Thousands Line Up in San Diego for 'American Idol' Season 7 Auditions
• 7/29: Unicorn Jones sports Harry Potter pin telling everyone not to spoil the ending!
  
  • Art imitates life: Harry Potter Author Talks About Ending
• 7/21: Who better to be romanticized in a movie about his life than Mike Baker? 'Baker's Dozen' would tell
  the story of how Baker saved 12 teenage orphans from a brutal sex slave trade… only to employ them as his own personal sex slaves
  
  • Art imitates life: Benicio del Toro Set to Play 'Che' Guevara
• 7/19: Who could be impersonating Bigfoot? Why none other than actor and director Gael Garcia Bernal. Gael speaks five languages, including the language of Bigfoot. He also is quite hairy and likes to dance
  
  • Art imitates life: Team Arrives in Michigan's Upper Peninsula to Begin Bigfoot Search
• 7/17: Greg's perfect dating service: one that matches singer/songwriters to shapely unicorns
  
  • Art imitates life: Hello stranger, are you sick enough for me?