Published December 07, 2009
Famous people don't have lower morals. They have higher opportunity.
That's the missing factor in all the finger-wagging analysis of the Tiger Woods mess.
I love my wife. A lot. I'm pretty sure my love could withstand some mighty powerful temptation. But you'll have to take that on faith. My iron fidelity isn't tested 400 times a day by sexually aggressive nightclub hostesses who keep whispering in my ear, "I want you. I love skinny white guys with messy gray hair."
You do? At some point, all that seduction can wear a man down. Or so I would imagine.
You know the greatest pickup line of all time? It isn't the one I used to employ so enthusiastically: "Uh, if you come up to my place, I'll clear my roommate's stuff off the couch so you and I can sit and talk."
The greatest pickup line of all time, as Bill Clinton learned by Inauguration night, is: "Hi, I'm the president." Close behind are its equally randy cousins: "Hi, I'm a multi-billionaire" and "Hi, I'm the casting director" and "Hi, I'm Jay-Z."
Guys, if you can say any of those with a straight face, you'll soon be fending 'em off with a wooden stool and a jumbo can of Raid.
Put it like this: Jack Kennedy actually got tired of Marilyn Monroe. He passed her on to Bobby. He said something to the effect of, "You take her, Little brother. You see the line outside?"
Quick aside: The second-worst pickup line of all time, after my old standby: "My wife is down in Orlando. She'll never find out." That one might seem effective initially. But as Tiger has abruptly discovered, it's rarely a good long-term bet.
So here we are, weighing the uniquely heavy burdens of these amorous professional athletes, these meet-you-in-my-room politicos, these born-ready rockers, these hot-to-trot movie stars.
Are their significant others less significant? Do they love their spouses any less?
Hard to say for certain without direct experience. And, oh, the crazy pleasures of finding out!
Ellis Henican is a columnist for amNewYork and Newsday and a Fox News contributor.