This is a rush transcript from "Special Report," May 9, 2014. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.
NEIL CAVUTO, HOST: You know, I always knew there was a saucy side to this guy. Now we all know it, because when he`s not dancing to raise attention to the nation`s debt, former Wyoming Senator Alan Simpson is making headlines for his love advice.
Here to spell it out, the senator himself.
Very good to have you, my friend. Thanks for coming.
ALAN SIMPSON, FORMER CO-CHAIRMAN, NATIONAL COMMISSION ON FISCAL RESPONSIBILITY AND REFORM: Well, I`m right here, yes. Do you have something you want me to counsel you about or something? Anything I can do here.
CAVUTO: Well, actually, yes, Dr. Ruth, I do.
CAVUTO: How did this start with you...
SIMPSON: I`m not...
CAVUTO: How did this start with you offering love advice here? How did -- was it just, did someone just bring it up out of the blue or what happened?
SIMPSON: It was the nuttiest thing you can imagine. A guy wrote me I had never heard of and said would I write a letter to a young woman in New York who was a reporter and a journalist with NPR, and just say, would she please come to the ball in Cody, Wyoming, at the Buffalo Bills Center of the West?
I thought -- I said to Ann, my wife, I`m not going to do that. And she said, what have you got to lose? So I called this gal, and I said, you know, here I am. Your boyfriend, who you`re a little estranged from, has written me to ask if you would come to the Cody ball. He would love to have you there. And we will all dance around. And I said, Ann, I won`t do it. And Ann said, do it. I did it.
And we talked to the young lady, Anna Sale, a wonderful person. And at the end, my wife said to her, you know, just listen and don`t let your pride get in the way.
So, after 60 years of marriage and doing 1,500 divorces in my practice of law in Cody, Wyoming, I`m not the poor man`s Masters and Johnson, but I did give her all the counsel you could imagine.
CAVUTO: Well, and a "Love Connection" sequel host was born.
I love what you said, though, on intimacy, talking about sex. You said, "When you talk about sex, you think, well, there`s a couple horny people. That`s not the point. It`s called intimacy, scratch my back, give me a hug, just a hug."
Very commonsense stuff.
SIMPSON: Yes, and -- yes, well, that`s really true.
I mean, it is -- people, it`s like a red light over in the corner. And if you have intimacy, which is not the big S., then you think it`s going to lead right to that. That`s not necessarily the case. But the real issue is warmth, a hug, you know, a kick in the leg in the sack, and you know, I love you. That`s not a bad thing to do.
CAVUTO: But you get better, Senator.
You went on to say on relationships, "The secret is you both try to control each other, and you both fail, but it`s critical you fail."
Why do you say that?
SIMPSON: Well, that`s so important, because you really try to control each other, and you think the other one doesn`t know it. And so you become very cunning and manipulative.
And you will say, do you know so-and-so does this, meaning you, you oaf, do this?
SIMPSON: But I`m throwing it over to a third party.
And it becomes -- it`s destructive. Finally, one will say to the other, you`re not my authority. I didn`t marry you to tell me what to do. We have different time schedules. We`re different people. I love you, but you`re not controlling me.
And the other one says, you`re not controlling me, and you can get along a long time in a good marriage that way.
CAVUTO: A lot of people know you for your fights in Washington and raising hackles with the AARP crowd and all this, but one of the things that hit me most in a lot of this advice, and it`s so commonsense, listen more, talk less. Be kinder first.
When you`re -- you have been married for 60 years. What`s the secret to that?
SIMPSON: Well, listening and never walking out the door. When you have those arguments, and one of them starts for the door, you say, just a sec. And never lift a hand, never even in the back of your mind lift a hand, but just say to the other one, don`t leave this room. I`m not -- you need to hear me out. And that`s a critical thing.
And then, be tender to each other. I mean, I didn`t mean a whack in the fanny like that. I meant just like that.
CAVUTO: All right, so I got that one wrong. Do not whack in the fanny. Do not, not whack.