• You wanna be the top dog? Sometimes you gotta talk about dogs.

    I'm talking hot dogs, and I'm talking about a New York City mayor who, even after more than a decade on the job, I don't think much relishes talking about hot dogs.

    Or for this billionaire turned politician, certainly not hot dog eating contests:

    (BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

    NYC MAYOR MICHAEL BLOOMBERG: If one of their dogged pursuers will finally catch up, cut the mustard and be pronounced wiener. No question, it's going to be a dog fight. Just think of how many we got into one sentence, that was really impressive. Who wrote this (EXPLETIVE)?

    (END VIDEO CLIP)

    Everyone had a good laugh, including the mayor. But Mitt Romney, you might want to take note, because this comes with the territory. You want the job, you better be prepared to deal with all the things that come with the job.

    Like pardoning a turkey every Thanksgiving. I think some presidents really get into it, although I have my doubts about the last president who came darn close losing something valuable doing it.

    We expect presidents to make big speeches, often with impressive backdrops. I think presidents love lighting up the world, but I think some of 'em have a much tougher time getting into, I don't know, lighting up a Christmas tree.

    It comes with their job, but I don't think they all flip over that part of the job.

    Don't get me wrong, Barack Obama can sing. And who knew President Bush could dance? But I think most of these guys fancy themselves top dogs making history and not promoting hot dog eating contestants making themselves sick.

    That's the part of the job I suspect, some like the mayor, don't relish. But to avoid getting kicked in the buns, they move their buns to honor a tradition or pardon a turkey. Because they'd look foul if they didn't.

    After all, it's part of being a leader, never removing yourself too far from a turkey.

    It keeps you humble, and on this Fourth of July, it sure beats the alternative -- having your loyal subjects think you're just a weenie.