• With: Jesse Watters

    WATTERS: What's the worst part about America?

    UNIDENTIFIED MALE: I live here.

    UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Something very strange about that man.



    WATTERS: Your governing philosophy is what?

    UNIDENTIFIED MALE: I need to get some marijuana.

    UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Smoke 'em if you got 'em.

    WATTERS: Do you think, Justin, I grow my own food?

    UNIDENTIFIED MALE: If you can.

    WATTERS: What if I'm really busy.

    UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Well, what will you be busy doing?

    WATTERS: Working.

    UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Stop working and grow your own food instead.

    WATTERS: But then how would I make money?

    UNIDENTIFIED MALE: No, this is more about food. It has nothing to do with money. You don't need money for food.

    UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Just take it easy, man.

    WATTERS: I was -- You seem a little angry.

    UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Why wouldn't he be? Good god, there's people starving to death in the world all over the place. Everybody's like let's (INAUDIBLE). It's like sports.

    WATTERS: You're not a football fan?

    UNIDENTIFIED MALE: I don't need -- want to deal with you. You're professional negative figure.

    WATTERS: Can you help me find what I'm looking for?

    UNIDENTIFIED MALE: I don't really want to. At this point in your life, you made so many bad decisions that have led to where you work. You deserve what you have earned.

    It's called damnation. Go away.

    WATTERS: I love you.

    UNIDENTIFIED MALE: No, you don't.

    WATTERS: Bill O'Reilly? You ever watch the show?

    UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Yes, I'm a fan. He's charming.

    UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Bill O'Reilly's good, but you are the greatest.

    UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Are you really Fox News?

    WATTERS: This is legit.

    UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Oh, for crying out loud.

    WATTERS: What do we have here. Father Jonathan at shroom fest.

    MORRIS: Exactly. In about an hour and a half, I'm going to be in a church, doing a wedding. I just stumbled across you. And hanging out at one of your favorite places, it looks like.

    UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Is this a joke?


    O'REILLY: So did you bust Father John at the mushroom festival? Is that where you're going?

    WATTERS: (inaudible) these expansive views on religion, I think.

    O'REILLY: He was there to do a wedding.

    WATTERS: I think. That's what he said. I don't know.