Every year, you say you're not going to bother with a Halloween costume, and every year, you get invited to a Halloween get-together where costumes are mandatory.
Of course, nobody's going to turn you away if you show up without a costume, but people are going to notice. They're going to be looking at you, judging you, and silently resenting you for ruining the aesthetic of their party — at least until they get tipsy off and completely forget why they're miffed.
Rather than put up with all that, why not just wear the simplest costume you could possibly string together? Show your hosts that you barely made an effort by dressing as …
#1. A Human Burrito
Oct 10, 2014 at 2:14pm PDT
What you'll need: a blanket, and maybe a friend to help you stand.
#2. Chilly Toga People
Oct 10, 2014 at 9:00am PDT
What you'll need: a sheet, a belt, maybe a few safety pins, and a cardigan.
#3. A Bespectacled Ghost
Oct 10, 2014 at 7:10pm PDT
What you'll need: a sheet and some glasses.
#4. Alvin (or the Other Chipmunks)
Oct 19, 2015 at 9:52am PDT
What you'll need: a large red (or green or blue) t-shirt and masking tape.
#5. Backwards Clothes Lady
Feb 2, 2013 at 4:39pm PST
What you'll need: clothes.
#6. Your Own Evil Twin
Nov 9, 2014 at 5:43pm PST
What you'll need: a fake mustache, or black construction paper and a scissors for creating a fake mustache.
#7. Two Guys in One Shirt
Aug 21, 2015 at 6:07pm PDT
What you'll need: a shirt.
#8. Marty McFly
What you'll need: a down vest, suspenders, sunglasses and a working hoverboard.
#9. The Snuggie Monster
Dec 12, 2012 at 7:06pm PST
What you'll need: a Snuggie or similarly sleeved blanket.
#10. Toilet Tissue Mummy
Oct 10, 2013 at 3:11pm PDT
What you'll need: Charmin Ultra.
#11. Angelina Jolie's Leg
Apr 4, 2014 at 6:14pm PDT
What you'll need: a dress that showcases your right leg, and a right leg.
#12. Curtain Man
Oct 10, 2013 at 7:07pm PDT
What you'll need: a window with a curtain in it.
#13. Lampshade Lady
Oct 10, 2016 at 11:07am PDT
What you'll need: a lampshade.
#14. A Robot (Series #0705)
May 5, 2014 at 6:26pm PDT
What you'll need: cardboard boxes, random packing materials and/or leftover HVAC equipment from the garage.
#15. A Nerd
Oct 10, 2013 at 7:12pm PDT
What you'll need: a pair of glasses, tape, a bowtie and suspenders.
#16. Your Dad, Circa 1987
Sep 9, 2014 at 10:14am PDT
What you'll need: a loud, beautiful sweater.
#17. Count Chocula
Oct 14, 2015 at 6:56pm PDT
What you'll need: a box of Count Chocula.
#18. John Waters
Oct 7, 2016 at 6:49am PDT
What you'll need: an eyeliner pencil and an upper lip.
#19. A Kentucky Derby Spectator
May 5, 2014 at 1:20pm PDT
What you'll need: a ridiculous hat, plus things to staple to it.
#20. The Rock, Circa 1994
Jul 7, 2014 at 10:52am PDT
What you'll need: a black turtleneck, a silver chain, a fanny pack, and if possible, and a hi-top fade.