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Fast Food

Hilarious Nick Offerman video insists that pizza grows on trees

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Nick Offerman tends to his juicy, vine-ripened pizza. (YouTube/You're the Cure- American Heart Association)

Ever wished that pizza really grew on trees? 

The American Heart Association enlisted comedian Nick Offerman, from the TV show "Parks and Recreation" and the folks at Funny or Die, to make those dreams come true.

Offerman, who in the video is food expert Daniel Frances (an obvious ripoff of his “Parks and Rec” persona Ron Swanson), takes viewers through fields of “ripe, juicy pizza” growing right on the vine and “orchards of taquito trees soaking up vitamins and minerals from the sun.”

Dressed in farmer’s overalls and a straw hat, Offerman lovingly plucks pieces of fast food items like fries and sloppy joes, all tenderly watered with Coca Cola.

“You see kids know what their bodies need,” chides the comedian, as a girl bites into a taquito and complains that her “teeth feel soft.” Offerman promptly tries to shoo the young girl out of the way.

By the end of the video the farce is revealed, as workers are seen struggling to attach fried fish sticks to a vine using a stapler. 

The AHA hopes that the campaign will get the public to rethink what kids are being served in school and to put more pressure on Congress to set stronger nutrition standards for kids’ meals through the reinstatement of the  Healthy, Hungry-free, Kids Act of 2010.

But we wouldn't mind just one burger tree in our backyard. 

Check out the full video, produced by Funny or Die.