Ask any child what America loves most, and they are very likely to say “eating” and “litigation.” Yes, we love to eat, but even more we love having to sign legal waivers that absolve the supplying business of any physical and/or emotional pain incurred thereafter by said individual(s) consuming said meal(s). Here are seven of the hottest meals served in America that will definitely inflict some serious pain.
1. Phaal - Brick Lane Curry House (New York City)
The phaal at Brick Lane Curry House in Manhattan has been described as quite possibly the spiciest curry available at any Indian restaurant. Brick Lane crams at least ten to twelve ground chilies into the dish, then makes you offer a “verbal disclaimer not holding us liable for any physical or emotional damage." Upon completion, you get a Certificate of Honor stating you "demonstrated extraordinary courage (and rather dubious judgment) risking life, limb, and dignity against the insurmountable Phaal,” the title of “Phaal Curry Monster,” and a beer. A nice, cold beer.
2. Pasta Plate from Hell – East Coast Grill (Cambridge, Mass)
Only a few people have ever finished an entire bowl of East Coast Grill’s Pasta Plate from Hell – or as they boast, “the spiciest pasta plate in the world.” This pasta dish contains the freakishly spicy Bhut Jolokia pepper, which is just a grade below U.S. grade pepper spray on the Scoville scale. However, don’t expect to have the pleasure of lighting your throat and mouth aflame via pasta whenever you want - the Pasta Plate from Hell is only available in December, during the restaurant’s aptly named “Hell Week.”
3. Great Balls Of Fire - Salvador Molly's (Portland, Ore.)
What was once a food cart is now a famous eatery in Portland, made more famous by Man vs. Food. Though the restaurant plays host to many food challenges (of which proceeds go to low-income Oregon families' heating bills), the one that will really prove your spice muscles (read: ability to stand stomach ulcers) is the Great Balls of Fire. Eat five of these spicy habanero-cheese fritters and their sauce, and you'll find your sweaty, red, bloated face pictured in the Hall of Fame.
4. Habanero Pizza – Flying Pie (Boise, Idaho)
The habanero pizza at Flying Pie is only available in August, because that’s when they can get their hands on a particular variety of habanero from southern Mexico and the Yucatan Peninsula. Once they get their hands on these peppers, they load up a pizza with them and send it down your stomach. “How spicy can a pizza get?” your jaded Phaal Monster friend might boast while taking a giant bite. But soon the intense dose of capsaicin will overwhelm their senses (and digestive system), making them wish they had stuck to their nice, little, easy-to-pick-at curry.
5. Spicy Tuna Roll Challenge - Bushido (Charleston, Sc.)
Bushido challenges you to eat ten spicy tuna hand rolls, each spicier than the one before. Only ten people have finished the challenge in one night, but since there is no “time limit,” most spice-inept people can only handle one roll at a time, taking a few months to complete the challenge. Since each roll is spicier than the next, this meal is to climbing a volcano as other spice challenges are to swimming in lava: instead of just dredging through hotness all at once, the Spicy Tuna Roll Challenge starts out easy enough, but you’re equipped with the painful knowledge that it’s only going to get worse.
6. Four Horseman Burger - Chunky’s (San Antonio, TX)
The Four Horseman Burger contains four of the spiciest peppers known to man: jalapeno, Serrano, habanero (in the sauce), and the aforementioned Bhut Jolokia (remember, that’s the near weapons-grade pepper). Of course, it wouldn’t be Texas if this meal wasn’t made into a challenge, so eat it in under 25 minutes (after signing a waiver, of course), then last another five minutes without drinking or puking, and the glory is all yours, you champion. This burger is so hot they even offer gloves, to prevent spice burns. Sadly, the gloves are for your hands, though, not for your tongue.
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