Last updated : Wednesday, March 10, 2010

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Win Over His Friends In 7 Moves

Over the weekend, I hit up a going away party for a close friend. Going away parties really let you know who your buddies are and (though it's of the bittersweet variety) are tons of fun. They are not, however, a traditionally great time to introduce a new squeeze (even if it does offer a certain effective symmetry). But a pair of new friends (a guy and a gal) were brought to the show nonetheless, and both got solid Bs (yep, we judged them). This is what you can do to ace your own meet-the-friends test:

1. Show up. A real smart guy once said that 90 percent of cheerleading camp is getting there with your pom-poms. That guy was a real Alfred Einstein because actually caring enough to clear schedule space is a biggie.

2. Find common ground. The battle to win these bozos over begins with a single mutual interest. Don't overdo it though. I got sucked into a running conversation about early '80s punk rock just because I really like Social Distortion on Saturday.

3. Know one thing about a few people. No one is ever going to call you on the phrase "BLANK has told me so much about you …" But, just in case, following that line up with a question about something that person is into is a great tactic. It appears people really do like talking about themselves.

4. Say a person's name. If Ryan Gosling in Lars And The Real Girl taught us anything, it's that a person's most favorite sound is their own name. Use someone's name liberally, and they will think you're a real Sammi Sweetheart (though less of a wet blanket).

5. Don't argue. I understand that you may have some strongly-held opinions, and that at least one of your new squeeze's friends is sure to be a raging goober or a blithering a**, but if the convo takes a hard swing out of friendly and into fist-y territory, you may be on the outs forever

6. Be into your date. Your style of dating may not involve things like compliments, PDAs or being really nice. Still, behave with a little bit of tenderness and, I don't know, have really nice things to say about your date, and periodically swing by to see what he/she may be up to.

7. Be a good sport. This goes with item #1 but, in general, go with the flow. I understand that you may not like sushi on grounds of dolphin friendliness (which I'm also against), but be a sport, be a pal, play Pictionary and be nice about it.

None of this is to suggest that you should be a milky milquetoast or someone other than yourself unless you're a spoiled, cold, pushy, selfish, grumpy sociopath who can't be bothered with other people's stuff. In that case, feel free to be someone other than yourself, for the rest of your life.

More From Yourtango:

What Do You Do When Your Friends Hate Your Man?
3 Tips For Introducing Boyfriend To Friends
Are You Cool With His Girl "Friends"?

For more dating advice click on iMag's Love Section.

 

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