Winning an Oscar doesn't bring you happiness, according to Nicole Kidman.
The Australian actress, who won an Academy Award for Best Leading Actress for her role as Virginia Woolf in "The Hours" in 2002, spoke at London's first Women in the World Summit in London on Friday and revealed that she felt the "loneliest" she had ever felt after winning the prestigious award.
The reason being, Kidman was still feeling sadness at the time due to her split from her first husband of 10 years, Tom Cruise, in 2001.
At the two-day summit, Kidman was asked if the "difficult time" she went through had unleashed creativity, given that "Moulin Rouge!," "The Hours" and "The Others" all came out following her breakup with Cruise.
"To be completely honest, I was running from my life at that time," the 48-year-old explained. "I wasn't able to handle the reality of my life and as an actor you have this wonderful thing where you can go and get lost in somebody else's life and become somebody else for a period of time, and when I look back on it, I really see that."
While she didn't see it at the time, the hard work paid off.
"Out of that came work that was applauded, so that was an interesting thing for me, because I was like, 'Ah.' So I then embraced my own life and I got myself together and it took me a number of years and during that time I worked a lot,” she continued. "The work was a great place for me to exist."
It wasn't until the Academy Awards, however, that Kidman realized it was time for her to get her personal life back on track and move on from heartbreak for good.
"That [work] culminated in winning an Oscar and that caused an epiphany," she revealed. "I was sitting in the Beverly Hills Hotel [holding this gold statue] and it was all extraordinary and I was the loneliest I'd ever been."
Kidman was then asked about her current life with country artist Keith Urban, who she tied the knot with in 2006.
"I was able to navigate through about five or six years and then I sort of stumbled into Keith, literally stumbled into him and in my spontaneous way, got married very quickly and we got to know each other when we were married."
Kidman admits that she and Urban were quick to wed, but they've made things work.
"We didn't know each other very well when we got married," she said. "And we navigated things but I wanted that and I wanted a partner."
Not only did she want a lifelong best friend, but the actress said she wanted to have kids with the "American Idol" judge as soon as she laid eyes on him.
"I wanted to have a baby the minute we met and he was like, 'No,'" she joked. "And I got lucky. I got to have a child when I was 41. I then got to have a surrogate who was an incredible woman in our life. I have two adopted children. I'm a mother that's experienced motherhood through many different avenues."