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Jennifer Lopez calls breakup with Ben Affleck her 'first big heartbreak'

HOLLYWOOD - MARCH 23:  (FILE PHOTO) Actors Ben Affleck and fiancee Jennifer Lopez attend the 75th Annual Academy Awards at the Kodak Theater on March 23, 2003 in Hollywood, California.  Lopez and Affleck postponed their wedding, which was scheduled for this weekend, and has now reportedly spit up, possibly temporarily.  (Photo by Kevin Winter/Getty Images)

HOLLYWOOD - MARCH 23: (FILE PHOTO) Actors Ben Affleck and fiancee Jennifer Lopez attend the 75th Annual Academy Awards at the Kodak Theater on March 23, 2003 in Hollywood, California. Lopez and Affleck postponed their wedding, which was scheduled for this weekend, and has now reportedly spit up, possibly temporarily. (Photo by Kevin Winter/Getty Images)  (2003 Getty Images)

Jennifer Lopez has opened up about her past loves in her upcoming memoir “True Love.”

In the book, she revealed the moment when she knew her marriage to ex-husband Marc Anthony was over and in a new two-part interview with NBC News' special reporter Maria Shriver, the singer opened up even further.

Lopez, 44, said her relationship – and breakup – with actor Ben Affleck led to her marriage with the salsa crooner and that it was her “first big heartbreak.”

“To have one of my best friends who I’d known for years who I actually loved and did have chemistry with come into my life and say, ‘I’m here,’” she said. “What you need to know is, nobody can save you or heal you. Only you can do that for you.”

The “American Idol” judge said she has battled bouts of low self-esteem and feeling unworthy of love. She told Shriver that it has gotten better, but that it is “still a work in progress.”

“It’s how you feel as a child, you know? Being a middle child and kind of being invisible sometimes, or you know, trying to get attention. So what did I do? I overachieved,” Lopez said. “I was the one who ran track and I won medals every weekend. Or I was the one who would go on the show and steal the show. And that would give me confidence. But there was a part of me that just wanted love, that felt like she wasn’t worthy of the love.”

The “Booty” singer, who ended her more than two-year relationship with Casper Smart, said that she is open to love, but thinks “it’s better to just be on my won for a minute and learn more about myself.”

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