Here's what's happening, people:
Like so many shapely celebrities before her, "Glee" actress Lea Michele did one of those obligatory half-naked photoshoots with Terry Richardson. (Is that a dove tattoo we see?)
Buzzfeed has decided that today's Jennifer Lawrence looks a lot like the Helen Mirren of yesteryear, and we can't really argue.
Taylor Swift keeps beating us over the head with her incredibly long legs in short shorts. We get it, Taylor — you're young and leggy.
Seth Meyers began his tenure as the host of "Late Night" on Monday, and opened his first show by mimicking fellow late-night host Jimmy Fallon's popular "Thank You" bit.
Late-night host Jimmy Kimmel is expecting his first mutual baby with wife Molly McNearney. The comedian already has two children from a previous marriage.
Paula Deen is back in the news because she's supposedly planning her comeback, but more interestingly, here's a picture of Deen riding Food Network host Robert Irvine like he's some kind of pasty bespectacled mule.
Actor, writer and director Harold Ramis died on Monday from complications of autoimmune inflammatory vasculitis. He was 69.
Olivia Wilde shared a picture of her baby bump on Twitter, and she looks 'bout ready to pop.
Despite slamming into a cop car while driving under the influence in 2012, it turns out that Amanda Bynes will only be sentenced to three years' probation and some alcohol awareness classes.
In other DUI news, it looks like Justin Bieber is definitely going to trial, as prosecutors claim they will not strike a plea deal.
Speaking of the Biebs, his VEVO video for "Baby" has reached 1 billion views. We could post it here, but Bieber doesn't really need the help. Instead, here's Huey Lewis and the News' endlessly entertaining video for "Stuck With You."
Amanda Seyfried will be the female lead in the sequel to "Ted," replacing Mila Kunis. But it doesn't really matter, because whoever gets that role is basically playing third-fiddle to a perpetually horny teddy bear.
Salma Hayek's younger brother was in a pretty serious car accident on Sunday evening in Los Angeles which claimed the life of his passenger. Sami Hayek reportedly lost control of his vehicle and slammed into an oncoming truck on Sunset Boulevard.
Miley Cyrus claims she'd rather "choke on [her] own tongue" than accept a mountain of money from NBC for playing Tinkerbell in their live "Peter Pan" adaptation.
The creative director of Givenchy has likened Kim Kardashian to Marilyn Monroe. (Does Kim have an too?)
Kim is evidently not content with the many flattering compliments thrown her way, which is probably why she insists on blasting her sister Khloe's taste in shoes.
Miranda Kerr is planning to release a song with "Jersey Boys" actor Bobby Fox: a cover of Elvis and Ann Margaret's "You're the Boss" duet from "Viva Las Vegas."
Somebody photoshopped Dita Von Teese to look like a tanner, brunette, toned-down version of herself. We prefer the real Dita, thank you very much.
For some odd reason, Kaley Cuoco's husband Ryan Sweeting shared a photo of his shape-changing stomach, both pre- and post-defecation. It's gross, yes, but also quite impressive.
Surprisingly, the next logical step in Ireland Baldwin's career was not as we previously theorized. She's got herself a new gig as an with Entertainment Tonight.
Judy Garland's three kids will all come together for a special tribute to "The Wizard of Oz" at this year's Oscars, because that's what we've all been clamoring for, is it not?
And finally, Taco Bell is going to introduce a breakfast menu nationwide, including items such as the Waffle Taco and the A.M. CrunchWrap.